“Ravi, have you gone mad? How on earth can my lovely son Prahalad be not mine?” asks my colleague Deepa a.k.a Deeps, little furiously. So do you, most of the readers, (especially women-folks), after reading the topic, isn’t it? However, read, re-read and cherish the ‘Life Juice’ in the following poem On Children penned by the legendary Kahlil Gibran, dubbed as the third best-selling poet of all time, behind Shakespeare and Lao-Tzu!
On Children
“Your children are NOT your children;
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but NOT from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong NOT to you.
You may give them your love but NOT your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but NOT their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit,
They come through you but NOT from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong NOT to you.
You may give them your love but NOT your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but NOT their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit,
NOT even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable”
- Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable”
- Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)
Hmmm… quite an outstanding thought, isn’t it? In fact, above is one of the precious ‘Life Juices’ I have received so far. Having experienced Life in India after 1970’s till now, I have seen / still see many a parent, pampering young minds, most of the time instructing them to DO WHAT they WANT to DO, conveniently ignoring WHAT their WARDS LIKE and hence WANT- Be it buying a piece of clothing or choosing one’s career or sometimes even life-partner!
Folks, with pure devotion to their only son, my ‘principal’ mother wanted me to be a Doctor, caring and nursing the sick. My ‘intelligent’ father who was forced to work in Public sector wanted me to become an Engineer and always be on my own! Look what I have become NOW?
On my own since over a decade now and thereby fulfilling my Dear Dad’s wishful thinking, am an Engineer-but-unlike-an-Engineer, today a ‘Career Doctor’ instead of a ‘Medical Doctor’! Now, aspiring to be a ‘writer’. Well, humor apart, the above poem of Kahlil Gibran holds good – Not only for me, but to everyone as well. When thought DEEPLY. In silence - Sans mobile phones or meetings! With plain pure reasoning!
When accepted in FULL and practiced in spirit, Kahlil Gibran’s poem ON Children would help ease many a ‘blood pressure’ situation Indian parents have these days, amidst a myriad of other new-age, life-style diseases – from “migraines” to meningitis! Read on…
Having worked with varied professionals-from Students to CEO’s over the years, I have observed that many, even among Gen X/Y are forced to DO what their parents / other elders and well-wishers WANT them to do. Most of the time parents want their wards to achieve in a field they themselves have achieved or could not have achieved. This causes quite a havoc in the mental state of the child/youth/man, as they may not share that WANT at all. Their real and ‘pure’ interest(s) could be somewhere else. Hence they tend to remain in a dis-satisfied state, on a complaining mode, most becoming self-centered introverts. Poor souls, they never given an opportunity to DO WHAT they Like to DO. Like my intelligence-buried-inside father who left me at a wrong time when I was 19!
Well, am not the one who will allow others (Including Yours truly and my Life-partner) to come in way of both of our WANTS or our dear daughter(s) WANTS. We have now made THEM understand to pursue and DO WHAT they individually LIKE(S) to do, irrespective of the pulls-and-pressures, this materialistic society confronts them. And then LOVE WHAT they LIKE to DO. FEEL it and Then LIVE it. So, No “templates” to compare with anyone and thereby possible increased heartburn and blood pressure, dysfunctional anger, dysentery or even diabetes! The only Question we would ask them now and THEN is “How do they think What they like?” – again be it their ‘clothing’ or ‘career’. Kindly note there is no “Why” here. NLP says combination of WHAT and HOW elucidates the best from the other person as they ‘THINK’ – With RIGHT brain activated! You would now understand the richness in ‘Three Powerful diamonds’ blog. Are you with me, dear reader?
Kindly note, When you are ‘thinking’, let your eyes point to the TOP RIGHT plane, in order to evoke the RIGHT brain, which we, in our ignorance, seldom USE during day-time as we are besotted with “templates”! Hence, most of the time having a “templated” mindset towards every SITUATION. Especially, rampant among the Super-educated Professionals, across domains. They all have the highest IQ, thanks to their over-used LEFT brain, but their EQ and SQ??
Am exploring more, the treasures Kahlil Gibran has LEFT for all of us, having just read his biography in the internet. You may get a glimpse of his art in http://leb.net/gibran/ and some of his writings in http://www.katsandogz.com/gibran.html
Having made an effort to make you folks think on Gibran’s thought on Children, hopeful that you and your family would cherish this ‘Life Juice’ from him. I gently recommend that every modern-day mother reads this and understands the depth of this stupendous poem. Am sure, if understood in its entirety, by every parent, Gen Y and Gen Z will be happy always doing WHAT they LIKE / WANTED to DO – Read more room for innovation and originality. Parents can don the role of ‘wicket keepers’, happily! Beware Dhoni!
Else, we Indians would forever remain as “IT masons” or “BPO clerks” to the world, owing to family and societal pressures. Most of the Gen Y students in India I have interacted with don’t have a clue as to WHY they chose a particular branch of study for their graduate studies and MONEY was the main motivator for MANY! “Marks” in School to get a college “seat” and then conditioned to see MONEY in everything! What a rat-race? For WHAT?
However, there is a silver lining. Most of Gen Z are clear to a great extent as to WHAT they WANT. All their parents have to do is be a ‘facilitator’
I sign off with my heart turning lighter as I have shared this masterpiece with my generation of Gen X. Munch, discuss and share your thoughts in the Comment section or feel free to write to me @ ravi@gatesandwindows.in
Yours friendly,
Ravichander Venkatraman
2 comments:
I read THE PROPHET (My memory is that this poem is from it)and some other works of Gibran in my college days. I have quoted this poem to many parents earlier.
I still remember I wrote this to my neighbour Nafeesa thatha as early as 1998 in Malayalam language.
Thank you Chandar for reminding the text once again.
The other day one of my friend mentioned about a conversation with his American colleague. My friend asked "Why Indians are leading as IT professionals both in US and as back office support staff in India?".
The American replied "We simply don't need these stressfull odd jobs. We do consider life first and then only the job!".
another heart melting blog from you sir!! i hope you have'nt forgotten me amidst your tight schedule..
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